One of the women in the group was the exception; that rare individual who held all the cards in life. Although she no doubt experienced the everyday set backs everyone faces now and again, car troubles or the occasional minor illness or the like, her life had been an unusually smooth path. Her marriage was happy and long lasting, her kids were successful and enjoying their lives, her home was perfectly appointed and exactly what she and her husband wanted. Now, in retirement, they were both relatively young and in great health and enjoyed traveling, their children, and their life together in every way. Her entire life had gone exactly according to plan.
I was envious, of course, in the nicest possible way. I would wish that for everyone, the smooth path, although there are only a rare few who are so privileged.
On one particular day, as we discussed the role luck plays in our lives, this woman stated boldly that there is no such thing as luck. She went on to opine that good luck is the result of good decisions, and if we have "bad luck" in life it is our own fault for not making better choices. I don't recall her exact words, but the meaning was crystal clear - the unfortunate have earned their misfortune, and have no one to blame but themselves.
The arrogance of her statement took my breath away. When I glanced at the other women quietly sitting there, I knew I wasn't the only one who was hurt by her careless judgement. When I looked around the table, I saw representatives of people everywhere. The childless couple who had battled infertility. The woman who had a one in a billion form of cancer that eventually took her life. The parents whose child was on track until suddenly they were lost to drugs or alcohol addiction or mental illness, despite having been present and involved and getting most things right. The woman who fled domestic abuse with the clothes on her back and her children in tow, fearing for her life with no where to turn. I saw heartbreak and empty dreams and unexpected disaster - people whose plans had come unexpectedly unglued.
What I didn't see was people who had brought their life changing problems upon themselves because they somehow missed getting it all "just right." I could not imagine having so little understanding of, or appreciation for, one's own good fortune, or, more importantly, how quickly it could all be taken away.
But then, as I struggled to find the right words to respond, selfishly wanting to put her in her place, she said the line which changed the moment for me, and made it unforgettable. After a long and uncomfortable pause, she said very quietly,
"Sometimes I worry that I have had things too easy. I am afraid that when I have to face a hard time, I will not have the faith to handle it."Suddenly, I realized that it was not arrogance but fear that came from her heart, no matter the words that were spoken. As she looked at each of the strong women in that group, she was afraid that she was the one who didn't measure up. In that brief statement, I found gratitude for the tribulations in my life. And in my gratitude, I found grace for her, as well.
In powering through those difficult moments, in surviving when you feel like you cannot go on, in overcoming obstacles that make life so difficult, we find God. When I am at the end of my rope, God lifts me up and sets me free. It is in hard times that I find my strongest faith.
No matter what happens from now until I leave this life, I have the assurance that God is present. I can overcome whatever Satan has in store for me, because my faith has already been forged from the difficult moments I have endured. I have already learned from my journey that God is with me, ever present in the time of need, standing ready to help me through whatever life throws my way.
I am grateful for the hard times that God has allowed me to endure. They have given me the certain knowledge that God will always be there, no matter where my life journey takes me.
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