Kindness

I have thought many times, "If only I could take two weeks to stay home and get things done."  I am behind on every project I've dreamed of accomplishing for the last I-don't-even-know-how-many years.  I need to clean, sort, donate, throw and otherwise organize my belongings.  Heck, I have a Christmas tree skirt I started before my 28 year old daughter was even born to finish yet that I could work on, if only I had the time.  But somehow, when facing down a mandatory order to remain at home and not leave, it does not sound that appealing.  I never have liked being told what to do (so I'm told, anyway!)  So being forced into it by a silent foe that I won't even see coming until it has run me over is a struggle.

Love

Spring is coming, and traditionally, this is a season of love.  From Valentine's Day to weddings, we think a lot about love in the spring.  It is a time of renewal, of hope, of anticipation - all pieces of the puzzle we call love.  But that is only part of the picture.  There is so much more to real love than the fairy tale we dream of.

Love can be hard, painful, lonely.  Love is found in joy and grief, togetherness and aloneness, fun times and hard times.  The love you feel on your wedding day is also found on the day you bury your spouse.  The excitement of holding your infant for the first time is also found in the fear you feel as you rush to the ER the first time with your precious child.  The companionship of having people you love accentuates your isolation when they are away from you.  This is the love Paul was talking about when he talked of the spiritual fruit of love.

Faithfulness

When we have been wronged, it is so very tempting to want revenge.  It is human to expect a price from someone who has gained at our expense.  When we are going through something painful or difficult at the hands of another person, we want to see them suffer and feel our pain, so they understand what they are doing to us.  They have broken our faith in them, and we want to exact punishment.

But God is just and fair, and in truth, there is no one who hasn't caused pain, created a wound on another, or forced suffering in some way.  We are all sinners, and we have all broken faith with God.  So, if he is going to punish one, he must punish all, for we all fall short.  We are all faithless, when it comes down to it.

But God is ever faithful to us.  He acknowledges our unworthiness, and yet, he allows us reprieve.  Into our broken human condition, God sent one who was perfect to redeem us and bring us back to him, if only we accept the gift.  In 2 Thessalonians 1:5-12 we read:

This is evidence of the righteous judgment of God, and is intended to make you worthy of the kingdom of God, for which you are also suffering.  For it is indeed just of God to repay with affliction those who afflict you, and to give relief to the afflicted as well as to us, when the Lord Jesus is revealed from heaven with his mighty angels in flaming fire, inflicting vengeance on those who do not know God and on those who do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus.  These will suffer the punishment of eternal destruction, separated from the presence of the Lord and from the glory of his might,  when he comes to be glorified by his saints and to be marveled at on that day among all who have believed, because our testimony to you was believed.  To this end we always pray for you, asking that our God will make you worthy of his call and will fulfill by his power every good resolve and work of faith, so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.

God is not allowing the pain of our human condition to break us.  Rather, he is conditioning us to submit to his will for us, so that we can join him in all of heaven's glory.  And in so doing, we are demonstrating for those who do not believe the power of God in all his grace and glory.

The power of the Holy Spirit is shown in his faithfulness to us.  We demonstrate the power of God by being faithful to others.  Grace is the gift of mercy to the unworthy.  Glorify God by being faithful to those who are undeserving, and God will give you grace in your unworthiness, as well.

Peace

When I was a young child, the benediction I heard each Sunday morning was from Philippians 4:7:

And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Children have a lot to absorb as they grow up.  Life is often arbitrary, from their point of view, and your day depends as much on your parents' and teachers' moods as it does on the events that make up that 24 hour period.  Most things surpass the limited knowledge and experience of a young child, and the search for understanding is continual and sometimes exhausting.

I think the same can be said in the life of  Christian.  Living is exhausting.  There is a lot to worry about.  Money, job security, home life, our loved ones... the list of concerns is extensive and ever present, especially in these current uncertain times.  Even when we are relaxing and having fun, the concerns of our unsettled world lurk in the subconscious.  Our hearts and minds are vulnerable, and Satan exploits our weakness to put a wedge between God and us at every opportunity.

My mother's invariable refrain, when I am worrying about something out of my control, is that everything will work out.  Her vision is not clouded - she has lived through a lot of hardship in her life, and she knows the world is not always a kind place.  But she also knows that God has a plan for her, and ultimately, everything does resolve, one way or another, and God has been there with her through it all.  Worrying didn't change anything, it simply added to the weight she was already carrying.  The older I get, the more I understand the deeper truth in her words.

God is ever present, and his shoulders are broad enough to carry every burden.  He has the full picture, while we are one piece of the jigsaw, isolated and confused.  Doubt is Satan's way of robbing us of peace, and he will manipulate us with it wherever and whenever he can.  When we trust God to take the weight of our concerns, as a child trusts their parent, he will give us an eternal peace that cannot be overwhelmed, no matter what our cares may be.

Perspective is everything, and my increasingly mature perspective is that life is not lived in the moment, but in the fullness of time.  God is with us for the long haul, no matter what the present looks like.  True peace cannot found in money, or health, or job or loved ones.  There is no lasting peace in our human condition.  The only peace that is guaranteed is the peace found in the confidence that God has us covered for all eternity; he is in control and has a plan, and no matter what the world throws at us, if we believe in him and accept his.  Wishing you peace in the turmoil of your daily life.  It will all work out in God's time.

Gentleness

From superficial appearances, one of my friends has it all.  They have enough money for a very comfortable life; they have a beautiful home, drive new cars, dine at nice restaurants regularly, travel frequently, entertain often and well, and have many friends and family that they spend a lot of time with.  The cracks in their "perfect" life were only visible if you were close enough to see the day to day struggles, which were fierce.  Looks can be so deceiving.

On one occasion, I don't recall what prompted it, but I imagine things had been particularly rough that day, my friend gave me one of the greatest compliments I will ever receive.  She told me that one thing she really appreciated about me is that I never judged her, even when so many others did.  She continued, "I feel like I can tell you anything, and you never criticize me, you just love me.  I don't know what I would do without you."

Wow.  What a testament to the importance of gentleness in the faith journey.  Because that is at the heart of what she was saying.  She wasn't implying I have no opinions - I do, and she knows it.  She wasn't saying that I didn't sometimes advise or suggest - because I trouble shot ideas with her a lot, and sometimes she went a different way than I would have chosen.  She wasn't looking for someone to agree with her 100% of the time, because that would have been false, and she didn't need that from me.  She was looking for someone to see her heart and know, truly know, that she was doing the best she could under extremely difficult circumstances, and to be supported and uplifted, regardless of whether she was doing well or otherwise.

In Psalm 18:35 we read:

You have given me the shield of your salvation, and your right hand has supported me; your gentleness has made me great.

I have never forgotten my friend's incredibly powerful words.  They changed my heart, and gave me a new understanding of how to live the Word.  Like David, we are all seeking solace and comfort when we feel the world is against us.  With the help of the Holy Spirit, we can show the powerful love of God through our gentle response to those who seek us out.

Actions speak louder than words is not just a cliché, it is a simple truth.  Living the fruits of the Spirit are not about gaining glory in this world for ourselves, but rather, living in such a way that we glorify God.  When we do that, we change lives, not just for the here and now, but for all eternity.

Generosity

Over the past few months, there has been a lot of media attention paid to the antics of wealthy parents across the country who have allegedly cheated financially in various ways to get their children admitted to competitive colleges.  Everything from changing answers on standardized tests to faking athletic accomplishments has been uncovered, to the ultimate detriment not only of the children involved, but also to the children who were thus cheated out of their rightful places in those universities.  It is disgraceful, dishonest and shameful, and no matter how much money changed hands, certainly not a generous act for any of the kids involved.

But this is not new, and I doubt anyone is much surprised.  The wealthy have been buying power and influence for as long as humans have had something with which to bargain, and their wealth usually gives them a winning advantage, at least in the short term.  Giving what is euphemistically referred to as a "generous donation"  is really nothing more than a payment to get something of value in exchange, whether its a college admission or a tax deduction or perhaps notoriety or fame.  Even when the dollar amount given may be very high, it is, in effect, a business transaction rather than a spiritual action, and hardly qualifies as a gift, freely given.

While the world oohs and ahs over the munificence of the wealthy, Jesus measured generosity by a different criteria.  In Luke 21:1-4 we read about the spiritual fruit of generosity:

He looked up and saw rich people putting their gifts into the treasury; he also saw a poor widow put in two small copper coins.  He said, “Truly I tell you, this poor widow has put in more than all of them; for all of them have contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty has put in all she had to live on.”

Generosity in the spiritual sense is freely giving everything you have for the glory of God.  It is an intentional, sacrificial action.  There is no holding back.  There is no quid pro quo.  There is no payoff or tangible gain.  Generosity is not a business deal with God, no matter how much you have.  Jesus exemplified the ultimate act of generosity, unrepayable, when he sacrificed himself on the cross.  By giving ourselves up to his will, we are living in the spirit of generosity as God would have us live.

Self-control

Although each spiritual fruit can be a challenge at any given moment, I think most people have at least one that they struggle with a little more consistently than the others.  For me, there is no question that my struggle is self-control.

For those who know me only slightly, that may come as a surprise.   An introvert by nature, I am usually fairly quiet, could never be accused of acting in a spontaneous or impulsive manner (just ask my daughter, Miss Impromptu, about that one!) and rarely lose my temper.  But, when you know me well, my sharp, sarcastic wit and quick mouth sometimes get the best of me, and I will slice open the heart of someone I care about with an unmindful word that I want to pull back the moment its said, which is, of course, one moment too late.  Although never intended to be hurtful, all too often the mouth engages before the brain thinks it fully through, and ugh.  Oh, the regret I have felt when I have seen the damage I can inflict so thoughtlessly.

In Proverbs 15:1-4, we read:

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.  The tongue of the wise dispenses knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.  The eyes of the Lord are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good.  A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.

In this season of Lent, when we are reflecting on the words of Jesus, I am reminded that, while he did righteously lose his temper, he did drive out demons and money changers, he did chastise and redirect those who engaged in wrong doing, he did not break the spirit or crush the soul of those with whom he was sincerely engaging.

I want to be known for being soft, not harsh; wise, not foolish; good, not evil; and gentle, not perverse.  Keeping reign on my tongue begins with the Holy Spirit.

Forbearance

The word forbearance can be translated in many ways.  Depending on the circumstance, we use the words tolerance, patience, long-suffering, or even refer to delaying consequences due, such as forbearance on a loan.  For most of us, it is one of the fruits of the Spirit that is easily skipped over, a vague word, somewhat archaic, easily overlooked.

But all of the fruits are important, and to understand fully what Paul is trying to convey, we have to dig deeper on those concepts which elude us.  The idea of forbearance is one such concept.

The term used in Galatians 5:22 is μακροθυμία (makrothumia).  For those who enjoy roots and stems of language, the two roots of this word are long and passion (or wrath.)  Forbearance is literally referencing holding our passions in check instead of reacting on a momentary whim.

Paul underscored this very concept of long temperedness when he used the same word, makrothumia, in 1 Timothy 1:16, which we normally translate as patience:

But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life.

Paul is encouraging us to restrain our anger with those who disappoint us, just as Christ remains slow to anger with us, despite our grievous flaws, as an example to others of Christian forbearance.  We cannot do it on our own.  It is only through our communion with the Holy Spirit that we have the ability to hold ourselves in check and follow that example.

Forbearance is about relationships, both with others and with God.  It is an active word, not passive, which means we must aggressively set about doing it, not sit back and wait for it to come to us.

This upcoming week, I will try to practice forbearance towards others who frustrate me.  We never know who is watching us, or how our actions will influence them.  Sometimes the simplest gesture makes the biggest impact.  I think that is exactly what Paul was talking about when he included forbearance in his Fruits of the Spirit.